Freezing your eggs. No such thing when I was in my college years and I wonder how my life would’ve been different if this procedure was around back then. I know for some, the pressure of finding “Mr.Right” would have diminished considerably. For them, the flavor of desperation would’ve been taken out of the picture; a good thing for both dating partners. But for me, that would’ve only been partly the answer.
The truth is, I probably wouldn’t have frozen my eggs. I wouldn’t have done it because I wasn’t mentally ready to entertain any thoughts of motherhood. Not all women “know” that they want children or can leap in to the future and see themselves as mothers. It was certainly not compatible with pursuing further education nor the career I wanted. And since most college students aren’t lining up at clinics to reschedule their motherhood, then we might wonder if some of them feel the same way.
Would it ever have been a viable option for me? Perhaps if someone had talked to me about my fears of motherhood and the misconceptions that I had, it might have been different.
For egg freezing to become a reality at such a young age (and let’s face it- the brain is still developing in the early twenties) it may take more than attending to the practicalities of the matter. More chatter about motherhood; help with understanding that motherhood isn’t an ‘event’ but rather an evolutionary path. Help with realizing that cleaning up your own mother issues will instill confidence and direction in your own journey. Perhaps more talk about these are the issues needed for young women who cannot see themselves as future mothers to take the leap.
Fenella Das Gupta is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist working in Northern California,specializing in fertility counseling. She works with individuals and couples as they make their way through the fertility maze. The other part of her work includes making fertility issues a newsworthy item, as she writes for the Petaluma Patch-a subsidiary of the Huffington Post. To read more about fertility issues in the news go to http://petaluma.patch.com/users/fenella-das-gupta-phd-neuroscience-mft/blog_posts